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Is It Okay to Spoil Your Kids?
The following article is offered for free use in your ezine, print publication or on your web site, so long as the author resource box at the end is included. Notification of publication would be appreciated. Title: Is It Okay to Spoil Your Kids?...

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What we teach our Children

Article:
The following article is offered for free use in your ezine,
print publication or on your web site, so long as the author
resource box at the end is included, with hyperlinks.
Notification of publication would be appreciated.

Title: What we teach our Children
Author: Andrea Cyrus, Msc.D., Rev., Mht.
E-mail: mailto:andrea@truechanges.com
Copyright: ©2005 by Andrea Cyrus
URL: http://joyfulparenting.truechanges.com/
URL: http://www.truechanges.com

Word Count: 377
Category: Parenting

What we teach our Children

I am becoming aware how much influence I have on my children and the children I work with on a daily basis. This is big and true for all of us.

I teach them even when I am not aware of it, when I simply flow through the house doing what comes next. Each time I get involved in their business, each time I talk to them, when I ignore them, as I am living my life, I am teaching.

What I do and how I respond to my Children, how much I get involved in their life it all makes a difference. The old way of thinking and approaching my children quickly falls away as I witness that as I am fixing their problems I teach them they can’t do it on their own.

Even my 2 year old learns that I am not willing to get involved in her business of not wanting to share


or not getting a toy back. If I do get involved, what do I teach her?
Don’t I volunteer to be her persoanl, everyday referee? Don’t I ask to be included in her battles? Don’t I tell her that I will fix her problems because she can’t? Don’t I take the role of judge and prosecutor by making up my mind about what is fair and not fair (even when my own limited perception can not be accurate)?

If I tell my child that it is not my job to determine who should get the toy, I send her on the way to solve her own problem and to learn from her own mistakes. She learns from her different approaches. She learns about choices.

You may think that this could never work in your home because you have experienced that things can get out of hand, and kids can easily get physical and violent if you don’t get involved.

Point taken and I have to admit it is harder NOT to get involved than to get involved AT FIRST. There is fear, and a bunch of what if’s……
My biggest what if though would be: “What if I prevent my children to learn, to become self-reliant and self-responsible because I let fear get in the way?”


About the Author

Andrea Cyrus, Author of the e-book Joyful Parenting, Life Coach and Dr. of Metaphysical Science has a passion for finding joy, and joyfully shares her findings through her work as a Life Coach.

 

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ScreamFree Parenting: Raising Your Kids by Keeping Your Cool (Screamfree Living) by Hal Edward Runkel (Paperback - Mar 22, 2005)
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Parenting With Love And Logic (Updated and Expanded Edition) by Foster W. Cline and Jim Fay (Hardcover - Jun 5, 2006)
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The Ten Basic Principles of Good Parenting by Laurence Steinberg (Paperback - May 3, 2005)
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The Baby Book by William Sears and Martha Sears (Hardcover - May 3, 2005)
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Setting Limits with Your Strong-Willed Child : Eliminating Conflict by Establishing Clear, Firm, and Respectful Boundaries by Robert J. MacKenzie Ed.D. (Paperback - Jan 25, 2001)
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Supernanny by Jo Frost (Hardcover - Mar 14, 2005)
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How to Talk So Kids Will Listen and Listen So Kids Will Talk by Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish (Paperback - May 3, 2001)
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Parenting the Strong-Willed Child, Revised and Updated Edition: The Clinically Proven Five-Week Program for Parents of Two- to Six-Year-Olds by Rex Forehand and Nicholas Long (Paperback - Feb 21, 2002)
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Parenting From the Inside Out by Mary Hartzell and Daniel Siegel (Paperback - April 22, 2004)
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The Happiest Toddler on the Block: The New Way to Stop the Daily Battle of Wills and Raise a Secure and Well-Behaved One- to Four-Year-Old by Harvey Md Karp and Paula Spencer (Paperback - May 31, 2005)
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Love and Logic Magic for Early Childhood: Practical Parenting from Birth to Six Years by Jim Fay and Charles Fay (Paperback - Dec 1, 2002)
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Unconditional Parenting: Moving from Rewards and Punishments to Love and Reason by Alfie Kohn (Paperback - Mar 28, 2006)
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Parenting Teens With Love And Logic (Updated and Expanded Edition) by Foster W. Cline and Jim Fay (Hardcover - May 31, 2006)
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Playful Parenting by Lawrence J. Cohen (Paperback - April 30, 2002)
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Grace-Based Parenting by Tim Kimmel (Paperback - May 17, 2005)
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Adoption Parenting: Creating a Toolbox, Building Connections by Jean MacLeod and Sheena Macrae (Paperback - Jul 15, 2006)
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Content Menu
  • 100 ways to connect with your teen

  • 10 outcomes you will love before potty training

  • 10 simple ways to say i love you

  • 10 things you can do to help a shy child

  • 10 ways to make toilet training fun exciting

  • 15 ways to create some extra holiday money

  • 3 major divorce parenting mistakes and learn how to avoid them

  • 5 steps to stress guard your family

  • 5 tips for successful grandparenting

  • 8 gifts of parenting

  • 8 steps to financially intelligent parenting

  • action points for effective grandparents

  • add adhd children being your childs best friend

  • andy griffith show family lessons

  • and this unto you

  • an examined life

  • an ntertaining evening

  • are we there yet

  • are your children growing up too fast

  • are your kids driving you crazy how character building charts keep you sane

  • are you addicted to your children

  • are you letting your children manipulate you

  • are you making time for your marriage

  • are you meeting all your childs basic needs

  • are you placing your children in danger

  • are you present with your children

  • aromatherapy for the parents of teenagers

  • authoritarian parenting permissive parenting or loving parenting

  • author interview mommy come home

  • a daddy baby shower new twist on the old baby shower

  • a harvest halloween

  • a history of names

  • a little girl with a big question

  • a minute can turn into hours for the child of a work at home mom

  • a season for giving

  • a servants heart

  • baby lullaby

  • baby name trends from classic to hip

  • baby safety checklist protecting your baby

  • baby shower gift ideas

  • backpacks and bullies is your child prepared

  • back to school advice

  • back to school time to recharge

  • bath time fun

  • bedtime without battles

  • behavioral strategy avoid the grey areas and deal only with black white

  • better aging

  • beyond the words a childs voice

  • be a good role model

  • birth of a baby birth of a parent

  • bless the children

  • born with instructions

  • boy do we get the garbage

  • breastfeeding 101 nursing basics for new moms

  • breastfeeding handling criticism

  • building your childs honest and fairness

  • build character now practical tools for busy parents

  • build your childs strong character through responsibility

  • bullies

  • calling forth a soulmate

  • caretaking parents entitled kids

  • childhood friendships

  • childrens allowance

  • childrens discipline how to resolve divorce parenting differences

  • childrens sexuality

  • children and divorce

  • children are people not machines

  • children patriots

  • children s discipline how to resolve divorce parenting differences

  • children who talk to angels

  • clean your house in half the time

  • committed parenting

  • convicting children

  • creative soap crafts

  • cut the costs of your new baby devour those yard sales

  • cyber parenting 101

  • dads are heroes

  • developing citizenship and patriotism in your child

  • developing your babys language

  • developing your childs compassion

  • developing your childs self discipline

  • developing your childs self respect

  • develop your childs critical thinking skills

  • develop your childs self confidence

  • diaper bags for dads papas got a brand new bag

  • difference

  • divorced parent do you alienate your child from the other parent

  • does your child need a bedtime routine yes

  • dont make these 6 mistakes when your child is having nightmares

  • do you want your children to be like you

  • eggs travagant eggs

  • elephants and teenagers

  • ericksons theory of human development

  • essential tips for the kitchen

  • every mom worries

  • family as as entity

  • family time

  • farm to market days

  • febrile seizures

  • first time parenting woes

  • five solid reasons why your child can be an achiever

  • five tips for successful grandparenting

  • five ways to turbo boost your parenting skills

  • fraternal twin parenting concerns

  • free african games

  • free baby shower games

  • free empowered kids game room

  • free kwanzaa games

  • frequently asked questions about reading to your child

  • fresh fun music for the whole family

  • friends are a gift you give yourself

  • friends fish the future

  • fun easy ways to help your family set goals for the new year

  • gaining a childs trust

  • getting great pictures of the kids this halloween

  • getting what you want in parenting

  • getting your husband involved in caring for your baby

  • gifted children

  • give your child the gift of self esteem

  • giving the gift of mama

  • glowing goblins

  • god dont like rich people

  • grace full parenting committing to nurturing the souls of our children

  • grandparenting ceremony